Whose success is it anyway?

Posted on May 23, 2019

I have always been fascinated by the notion of success. How many of us are really clear about what success means? How deliberate are we about the success we pursue? Are we creating success or are we chasing it?

Typically at some point in our lives somebody defines what success "should" mean for us and we enter one race after another without even recognizing the places we arrive.

In my practice, I meet so many accomplished people who still judge themselves based on someone else's criteria. That's why I love asking my clients about their proudest moments. Not necessarily the moments they were celebrated for but the ones that actually meant something deeper for them. I ask about that internalized sense of pride. The results that they cherish even if others don't.

So, when you think about your life, what are your top 5 proudest moments? Those moments that belong truly to you? It may be the smile on a kids face after you helped them up from a fall, it may be completing a complex puzzle, it may be a sales target, it may be learning a different language, it may be developing a product feature… it may be anything and everything.

Once you identify those proudest moments, look for some clues. What do they tell you about you? Your values? Your needs? How much of your current role in life has room to replicate these? What can you do to make some room if you discover that your space is too tight at the moment?